Little me and big me are ready for summer

 

 

I am getting really in-touch with myself right now. I am digging deeper and moving forward. One big thing I'm focusing on right now is that there is an unfulfilled child in me who needs attention.

This is something I've known for a really long time, and it isn't new to me, but I want to start making a more direct effort to work on it. I remember once, when I was little, the neighbor kids were all outside playing a literal water gun war. Running around the street and sidewalks, hiding in everyone's yards and behind cars. I went outside to say hi and they gave me a water gun and I jumped right in. It was so fun!!! I always think of it fondly and it's one of my most prominent summer memories. A few years ago, my dad treated me to four fantastic water guns. Sarah and I play with them every summer!!! I want to play with them more. I even want to convince my dad to buy us a pool like we used to have when I was a kid. He said he might  go for it next summer, but I want to see if he'll spring for it THIS summer. This summer's so important to me emotionally.. I'd love to have a pool to hang out in whenever I'm relaxing at home!

I wanna buy something like this before summer comes along...

Not only for the toys, but for the backpack!!! I want a cute clear backpack to take places. The beach toys are a bonus because Sarah and I always wanna play in the sand when we go to the beach. :'-) I think it'll be fun to take around.. and clear backpacks are so unbelievably cute...

As of right now I'm playing a TON more than I usually do because of June. I love to run around and play tug-o-war with her and everything!!! She always loves to see me because she knows I'm probably gonna come out and play with her. Now that she's getting a little older and is at the end of her big growth spurt, she's become so much more mellow, too. We love to chill together. I can't wait for Sarah to meet her and play with us! My dad might not spring for a big pool for us to play in, but he said he definitely wants to buy a plastic kiddie pool for June to play in. THAT is gonna be a lot of fun. She loves to play in water! We've never had a dog who enjoys water. She really is such a breath of fresh air for my family. My dad likes to act tough and talk bad about her, but she's been behaving so well with training and has been growing up to be a lovely dog, and he loves her a lot! I think playing with her has helped me realize just how much I need to be playing and fulfilling the childhood I missed out on.

Sarah helps me out a lot with this lost kid stuff. She likes to play too. It means the whole entire world to me. Now that she's moving here, I think things are going to be genuinely different. I've been saying that a ton lately, and I truly believe it. So much has happened these past few weeks, and I feel like I'm a better person because of it. I no longer feel weight on my shoulders nor pressure on my emotional self. I feel open and ready to grow and smile and feel happy. Things are gonna be different in so many ways, and I think the unfulfilled kid in my heart is about to be very happy.